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Ocena wątku:
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Wzór na wiersz
#1
Wena, pomysł, czas, atrament –
Z mózgu w kartkę twórczy zamęt.

Epitety, słowa, zdania -
Coś na bieli się wyłania.

Stylistyka, strofy, wersy
Tworzą dzieła zarys pierwszy.

Garść metafor oraz puenta
I już wiersz jest do przyjęcia.

Intonacja, akcentacja,
Zwłaszcza zaś interpretacja.

Wreszcie można recytować
I owacją się częstować.

Jeśli rytm jest i muzyka
To piosenka z nich wynika.

Lecz choć tyle za wiersz stanie -
Najważniejsze jest przesłanie.

Wszystko kwestia rzemieślnika -
Dobry warsztat i technika.
Tylko poczucie humoru nas może ocalić.

"Kaczmar nie wygrałby "Nadziei". Kaczmar nawet by się nie zakwalifikował ze względu na brak elementu autorskiego." - Zeratul
Odpowiedz
#2
I to jest materiał na piosenkę. Taką na bis - króciutką.

W piątym i szóstym dystychu powtarzają się rymy.
Odpowiedz
#3
Simon napisał(a):W piątym i szóstym dystychu powtarzają się rymy.
Możesz rozwinąć?
Tylko poczucie humoru nas może ocalić.

"Kaczmar nie wygrałby "Nadziei". Kaczmar nawet by się nie zakwalifikował ze względu na brak elementu autorskiego." - Zeratul
Odpowiedz
#4
Układ rymów dystychami:
1. a a
2. b b
3. c c
4. d d
5. e e
6. e e
7. f f
8. g g
9. f f

Piąty i szósty sąsiadują ze sobą. I tworzą cztery rymy pod rząd.
Odpowiedz
#5
Simon napisał(a):Piąty i szósty sąsiadują ze sobą. I tworzą cztery rymy pod rząd.
Co stanowi wyzwanie dla autora muzyki, nieprawdaż? Wink
Tylko poczucie humoru nas może ocalić.

"Kaczmar nie wygrałby "Nadziei". Kaczmar nawet by się nie zakwalifikował ze względu na brak elementu autorskiego." - Zeratul
Odpowiedz
#6
michalf napisał(a):Co stanowi wyzwanie dla autora muzyki
Bez wzgledu na muzykę - to sąsiedztwo będzie zauważalne.
Odpowiedz
#7
6 dystych zmieniony.
Tylko poczucie humoru nas może ocalić.

"Kaczmar nie wygrałby "Nadziei". Kaczmar nawet by się nie zakwalifikował ze względu na brak elementu autorskiego." - Zeratul
Odpowiedz
#8
Jak się to czyta, to pisanie wierszy wydaje się łatwizną. Tylko, żeby tak było w rzeczywistości.
Plus Leonardo i Mach
Odpowiedz
#9
tmach napisał(a):Tylko, żeby tak było w rzeczywistości.
A to ciężka robota. Ile nocy bez snu Big Grin
Pozdrawiam ciepło
[color=#0000FF][i]Gałąź kona najpiękniej,
Bo umiera, gdy pęknie
Pod owoców zwieszonych
Ciężarem.
Mnie zaszkodził łyk godzin,
Ale jak tu być zdrowym?
Wódki miarę czas leje za barem.[/i][/color]
___________________________
[url=http://www.cienski.pl][b]www.cienski.pl[/b][/url]
Odpowiedz


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  Jezu (czyli wiersz nigdy nie dokończony) Sławek 14 4,886 08-14-2007, 11:15 PM
Ostatni post: Sławek
  Pierwszy wiersz mój michalf 14 3,944 07-24-2007, 07:35 AM
Ostatni post: Sławek
  Mój pierwszy wiersz Sławek 6 3,440 07-23-2007, 03:34 PM
Ostatni post: Simon
  wiersz kipson 2 1,464 07-18-2007, 06:46 PM
Ostatni post: ann

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